Saturday, March 1, 2008

Adhuri Zubaan

jab bhi teri ankhein bolti hai
Urdu Urdu si hawaah chalti hai...

aksar nam aankhon mein teri,
meri baatein bhig jati hain...
ek ghazal ubhar kar ati hai
phir seene mein dab jati hai...

jab jab main sochoon tujhe,
aankhein hisso mein baras jati hai,
baat puri nahin hoti kabhi,
kavita bhi adhuri rah jati hai...
at

9 comments:

  1. AfrozMarch 6, 2008 at 9:41 AM

    baat puri nahin hoti kabhi,
    kavita bhi adhuri rah jati hai...




    LOVE IT

    ReplyDelete
  2. vikasgoyalMarch 7, 2008 at 7:11 AM

    Hi Manali, Achha thought par kavita ki vyakaran (grammar ) mein dosh hai.. Theek kar ke likhne ki koshish ki hai. Hope u wont mind...jab bhi teri ankhein bolti hai
    Urdu Urdu si hawaah chalti hai...

    aksar nam aankhon mein teri,
    meri baatein bhig jati hain...
    ek soch ubhar kar aati hai
    phir seene mein dab jati hai...
    If u want to use jazbat then it should be ubhar kar aata hai) so u can use a word like soch or baat

    jab jab main sochoon tujhe,
    Aankhein hisso mein baras jati hai,
    baat puri nahin hoti kabhi,
    kavita bhi adhuri rah jati hai...
    ( Again naine ke saath striling nahin lagta yadi aap naina likhengi to baras jaate hona chahiye, Baras jati ke liye aankhein better hai.. Hope u dont mind

    ReplyDelete
  3. Manali_AainaMarch 7, 2008 at 10:01 AM

    thanks Piyush n Vikas for corrections...Thanks Affi for appriciating and encouraging...

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousApril 19, 2008 at 5:35 PM

    Hello. This post is likeable, and your blog is very interesting, congratulations :-). I will add in my blogroll =). If possible gives a last there on my blog, it is about the TV de Plasma, I hope you enjoy. The address is http://tv-de-plasma.blogspot.com. A hug.

    ReplyDelete
  5. KousaniJanuary 12, 2009 at 9:11 AM

    Very nice! You are very lucky that you have someone here to correct the grammar also!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Sanjay GTFebruary 26, 2009 at 4:15 AM

    Magnificent.

    ReplyDelete
  7. UnknownApril 10, 2009 at 10:52 AM

    Hi, Kavita bahut achhi lagi.. Khas kar "Ajeeb sa lagta hai"... sach me bahut achha likha hai.

    ReplyDelete
  8. UnknownApril 10, 2009 at 10:57 AM

    Hi, Kavita bahut achhi lagi.. Khas kar "Ajeeb sa lagta hai"... sach me bahut achha likha hai.

    ReplyDelete
  9. UnknownApril 10, 2009 at 10:57 AM

    Hi, Kavita bahut achhi lagi.. Khas kar "Ajeeb sa lagta hai"... sach me bahut achha likha hai.

    ReplyDelete

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